Sasha Gradiva, who I admit I don’t know, went retro—as in’80s Terminator style. (Insert your favorite fashion-related, Ah-nold-inflected Terminator joke here.)

Bonnie McKee is perhaps the only person I’ve ever seen with hair extensions for her dress. It just looks like she really needs to shave her armpits.

And while Katy Perry looked fairly lovely, she just reminded me too much of the Blue Fairy. Or maybe she is still trying to make the Smurfs happen.

My first reaction on seeing Fergie? “That is not a dress.” And it’s not. It’s really like a scrap of lovely material. I can’t wait for the lace trend to end if this is the result. Also, why are you wearing granny panties when your dress is see through?

Skylar Grey looked a bit like a zombie bride. Btw the’90s really wants its look back.

Robyn chose to wear a mullet dress and lumberjack shoes. At least she picked a theme and went with it.

And Nicki Minaj, oh, Nicki Minaj. Thanks for escorting a bishop and sporting a little red riding hood look before freaking out on stage. (Also, thanks so much for taking the title of one of my favorite Audrey Hepburn films and ruining it via song.)

Win of the Week: ADELE! You go, girl!

–By Lindsay Ray

Ah, Downton: Glamorous clothes, polite gasps, crisp British exchanges and TONS of drama.

Hi, my name is Lindsay, and I have a problem. I’m an Abbey-aholic. I hang on to every gesture and subtext between Matthew and Mary, I get excited by the prospect of a Bates-Anna non-platonic interaction, and I desperately want to be as cool as the Dowager Countess when I’m that old.

If you’re out-of-the-loop, then you have no clue what I’m talking about. It’s Downton Abbey, the British series airing on PBS and currently taking the U.S. by storm (because even though we declared our independence centuries ago, many of us are still anglophiles). Or as I like to think of it only the greatest melodramatic soapy goodness set in early twentieth century Britain. If you’re a super fan, then you already know all the cool kids are talking about it. (Seriously, it’s much-anticipated water cooler talk Monday mornings where I work.)

But why is DA so buzzworthy? Why all the fuss? Because it’s damn good television. Because it’s a good story. And I’m a firm believer that people are inherently attracted to good stories because as human beings we like to communicate with one another, and what better way to communicate than through entertainment?

Here are the elements that make Abbey so addictive and keep me (and millions of others) tuning in each week:

1) It’s well written. I was sick the first weekend I watched the show. My bestie had been begging me to watch, and it had been sitting in my Netflix queue for weeks (practically forever in Netflix terms). At first, I was unimpressed. Oh, a fancy mansion in Britain. There are the rich people, there are the servants, they all have problems. Snooze. I’ve seen this movie before, read this book. But then, but then…there was a twist. One I didn’t see coming. I sat up; I took notice. And I hit the button to immediately move on to the next episode. I marathoned that entire weekend while I convalesced. And I appreciated what I saw. There are nuances to actions and twists and turns to each storyline. Even the most mundane activities of cleaning the house are made interesting. The dialogue is snappy, as anyone who has even seen one scene with the Dowager Countess can attest. Which moves me into my next point…

The Dowager Countess: She of gems like "I'm a woman, Mary. I can be as contrary as I choose;" "Don't be defeated, it's very middle class" and "Put that in your pipe and smoke it."

2) The characters are fleshed out. Part of the set up DA is learning the intricacies of each character. These are characters we can care about, characters we can despise. They’re complex and realistic. Some characters slowly bloom, with different aspects of their personalities and pasts slowly unfolding as the story advances. Other characters are very upfront with who they are, but are then forced to grow and change when faced with circumstances they are unprepared for. The story arc of Lady Mary perhaps best exemplifies this. It is easy to grasp her character in the first season, and while she grows some during that arc, it is during the second season we have seen aspects of her personality heretofore unexplored. Furthermore, Lady Mary is just one of many strong female characters on the show. So many themes are explored within the confines of one household, and one of the more interesting ones is the role women play. With the advent of the second season and its backdrop of World War I, the roles the women play in the household have been expanded and re-evaluated. With no shortage of strong female characters, it is interesting to watch their interactions with one another, especially in the context of a patriarchal society bound by rigid gender rules.

3) It’s well acted. Part of why the characters succeed is the writing. The other part is the acting. Each character is nuanced, and there are subtleties to their actions. The actors are very good at embodying their roles and making you believe in this reality of twentieth century Britain. You understand each character’s motivations because it is in his/her line delivery or on his/her face or obvious in what he/she holds back. Plus, there’s a reason you keep hearing the cast’s names at awards shows.

4) Who doesn’t love an upstairs-downstairs mentality? As I said before, there are many themes explored in DA. One of the main ones is class and societal restrictions. This context is endlessly fascinating. Not only do we get to see the rich and noble, but we also get to peek behind the scenes, below the staircase to the inner workings of the house. Part of it is celebrity fascination—seeing how the wealthy live and then getting the real gossip on them from their servants. The other half is in capturing the everyday quality of the servants’ lives—their hopes, struggles and even the mundane tasks. It is the entirety of early twentieth century (and one could even sya modern) society compressed into the microcosm of a single household.

5) The clothes are fabulous, and the house is grand. And while all these weighty themes are being thrown around and dramatic scenes being well acted, let’s just admit it—it’s pretty. The attention to detail is fantastic. The Abbey fashion is enviable, and I sometimes wish I had a reason to dress for dinner and then I could steal one of Mary’s many evening dresses or try out Sybil’s flappertastic outfit. But what is even more amazing is the house. They actually film some at Highmere Castle, which serves as part of the inspiration for the storyline. And what’s even better, if you truly wanted to lose yourself in the DA realm, you could. The current earl and countess open their home to the public for visits. So the level of style seen in DA is attainable.

6) Dame Maggie Smith. Need I say more? She’s a scene-stealer. And she gets all the best lines in the show.

7) It’s easy to play catch up or re-watch your favorite episodes. Netflix and PBS make it super easy to play catch up or to immerse yourself in that world. Ah, the powers of the Internet and it anglophilia-enabling.

For super fans—a little fun to be had (Beware, there are some season two spoilers):

Downton Abbeyoncé: Your fave characters mix it up with Beyoncé lyrics.

Downton Pawnee: My two favorite shows combined! Ron Swanson meets the Dowager Countess.

Sh!t the Dowager Countess Says: Because we all know she gets the best lines.

Downton Abbey/X-Files: More cult favorites mashups.

Downton Actors in Street Clothes: Gasp! Yes, they’re real people and are slightly more glamorous in real life. Personally, I find this peek behind the curtain fascinating. Hello, Mr. Bates!

–By Lindsay Ray

So I was watching Glee this week (mostly out of habit and partly because who doesn’t love a hot mess), and I tuned into New Girl afterward because, as viewers of the show are aware, Schmidt is hilarious and says the darnedest things plus it promised me the oh-so-sarcastic Lizzie Caplan. I enjoyed myself, and I enjoyed the episode and the central theme—how women relate to one another.

But then I made a mistake. I read a review of the most recent show, and I went ballistic. Why? Because people were dissing Zooey Deschanel and her character, saying she was infantilizing womanhood. It’s an argument I’ve heard before, particularly around the time Hello Giggles launched. And after hearing about all the hate being heaped on Lana Del Rey (which is it’s own hot mess of issues, one of which is femininity and constructed femininity), I just couldn’t really handle more hate for another woman. And maybe I’m a hypocrite for jumping into the fray or for even commenting on the issue when I know I’m guilty of more than one of the party fouls being committed, but here goes.

The central issue of the most recent episode of New Girl is that Lizzie Caplan’s character doesn’t like Zooey Deschanel’s character, Jess. And girl fighting ensues. If you want a recap of the episode and some of the issues addressed, you can read about it here (http://nymag.com/daily/entertainment/2012/02/new-girl-recap-season-1-episode-11.html) although I don’t endorse all the author’s points.

The entire controversy surrounding Deschanel, and covered in the episode, is that she is über girly, childlike and encapsulates the manic pixie dream girl persona. As a result, some people see her as dippy and helpless—a step back on the feminism front. At least that’s part of the argument Caplan’s character makes. And what does Jess do in response? She gets with her girlfriends and bags on Caplan’s character. Like girls do. Fighting without really fighting. And it just becomes an endless cycle of women dissing other women.

But my argument is: Why must one brand of femininity be better than the other? What makes being girly so wrong? As Jess proves in the episode, she isn’t completely clueless. She isn’t helpless. Girlfriend can stand up for herself when she needs to. So why do others look down on glitter and ribbons and braking for birds? Hey, I like sparkly things, occasionally make up cutesy words and think young adult and children’s lit is some of the most creative in the market (I’m eagerly awaiting the Hunger Games flick). Does that make me dippy? Hell no. I like to think of myself as multi-faceted and that’s one side of my personality.

I identified myself as a feminist when I was in college. I had heard the term thrown around before and had only jokingly said, “Well, maybe then I’m a feminist.” But I knew in a moment when I had helped bake rolls for dinner and my grandma thanked me and said, “You’ll make a great wife someday,” that I was a feminist. I chose to label myself at that point. Because I wished I had burned the rolls. I liked baking in and of itself—wasn’t that enough? It wasn’t meant to be some sort of man-trapping bait. What if I didn’t want to be a wife? I wanted the power to choose to be whoever I wanted to be. And that’s how I define feminism—having the power to choose and act on that choice.

So after that tangent, I return to my central point: why is one definition of femininity better than another? Isn’t the point to embrace your individuality? Is there only one way to advance things for women? Wouldn’t actually embracing all forms of womanhood be a step forward more so than infighting about what is an accepted form of womanhood?

If you don’t like Deschanel and her doe eyes, then fine, you don’t like her. Everybody doesn’t have to like everybody else and hold hands and braid friendship bracelets. But don’t bag on her brand of womanhood just because it doesn’t line up with your ideals.

–By Lindsay Ray

Not only did they win for best ensemble, but the ladies of Modern Family also definitely win for best dressed in my books.

Yet again, Ariel Winter shows up to the red carpet looking so cute and age-appropriate.

Ditto Sarah Hyland who was also looking lovely.

And I loved the vivid colors and details on the two leading ladies’ dresses.

The draping back of Julie Bowen’s dress was fab. (Mostly because she has the back to pull it off.)

And the structure of Sofia Vergara’s gown showed off her curvy figure to a T.

A Splash of Color

My other favorite dresses of the evening included just a little splash of color.

Dianna Agron also rocked a frock in the same fuchsia color palette as the Modern Family ladies. I even dig her Heidi hair (probably because I always secretly wanted to figure out how to braid my hair like that when I was little and had just seen Heidi for the first time).

Diane Lane, on the other hand, let the fantastic color of her dress speak for itself and went simple with her hair and accessories.

Now, if I were Kyra Sedgwick and had a body like that, I would totally wear a stunning red dress that showed off my tattoo, too.

Michelle Williams also looked stunning in red although I think I liked her dress more during the telecast and before I realized it wasn’t a full-length gown. I’m still counting this as a win for the lovely lace detailing.

There’s just something about a redhead in green. I particularly enjoyed Ellie Kemper. Maybe because she always seems so happy everywhere she goes.

But my favorite hue of the evening? Emily Blunt’s bright choice.

Back to Basics

Sometimes it pays to keep it simple. It worked for the cast from The Help.

Viola Davis was stunning in this white Grecian-looking Marchesa.

And I even liked Emma Stone’s tea length McQueen. I think the perfect lippy and updo saved it for me.

And if you’re going to go with a basic color, then put a little va in your voom a la Naya Rivera.

Nah to the Neutrals

But then sometimes neutral colors are just boring. I’m looking at you, Juliana Marguiles and Tilda Swinton. C’mon, Swinton, pull it together. You were supposed to swan into this thing with an intriguing outfit, not some boring ol’ bedsheet.

And Zoe Saldana, hon, you’re hot. Why would you ever wrap your body in gauze and saran wrap? You deserve better.

And Kristen Wiig opted for yet another baggy neutral dress. Snoozefest. Except she decided to mix things up a bit by wearing a dominatrix-esque choker with it. Who even does that?

What the What?

But I saved my big WTF?!? moment for  the lovely Rose Byrne. A beaded pantsuit??! I don’t care if some people think you took a fashion risk, take it back to wherever you found it and leave it there.

In other news, Kaley Cuoco looked like a walking cloud. (With bad Heidi braid!)

Amber Heard looked like her torso had been wrapped in ace bandages.

And Shailene Woodley looked like she was wearing really bad wallpaper.

Win for most melodramatic pose of the evening: Lea Michele natch.

That's not a thigh-high slit, honey. That's a HIP-high slit.

–By Lindsay Ray

Like this trashy but popular number:

Dear people who are doing this: why won't you go away?

Leggings aren’t pants! And they look especially silly with Ugg boots on warm winter days. Also, don’t even pretend you’re Audrey Hepburn in your ass-cleaving leggings and ballet flats. Get yourself a pair of cigarette pants or skinny jeans and skip the leggings.

And who in her right mind thinks this is attractive?

Your vagina is wondering what it did to deserve this.

I’m really trying to find empathy for people that like mom shorts. Ummm, ummm…sorry, can’t. They emphasize the crotch area in a bad way and make you look like you’ve given birth to dozen of babies. Might as well strap on a fanny pack and thick glasses to accentuate the look.

Ten years ago, a getup like this would raise eyebrows for its implications. But now since they’re trendy, “furry” hats are fairly common eye sores. It looks like you’re wearing a hunting trophy around your head. Creeepy.

–By Jenna Cooper

While Michelle William’s had a pretty awesome headband, I loved Charlize Theron’s sparkly headband because I’m squirrel-like and can’t resist shiny objects.

Frida Pinto’s fantastic necklace perfectly compliments her fairly simple dress.

Same goes for Heidi Klum’s necklace (at least I think it’s a necklace and not part of the dress). I love how the turquoise contrasts with her frock, which I’m not too fond of on its own.

Julianne Moore went with a simple black dress but the entire better to show off her stunning earrings. Look how they pop!

Mila Kunis was also oddly boring in her dress but her fantastic earrings almost make up for it. (Also, what lovely soft makeup!)

Angelina went full-on glam. And while her tailored dress was super sexy, what I appreciated most was how well her bag matched the red flap at the top of her dress.

Amazing hair can in and of itself be a fantastic accessory. And Salma Hayek had fabulous hair.

And while Zooey Deschanel’s ’60s look was bold, I especially appreciated her cute and event-appropriate nails.

–By Lindsay Ray

The clear winner of red carpet looks for me? Claire Danes’ monochromatic stunner. It seems fairly simple in the front, but then she gives an over the shoulder look, and the dress goes from simple to stunning.

Octavia Spencer was fantastic and just so sassy in The Help. And she was lovely in lilac on the red carpet.

Another castmember from The Help, Jessica Chastain, was also a big hit with me. (Actually most of that cast had great dresses.) From far away, her dress looks so simple, but up close, it has lots of delicate pearl detailing.

While I wish Rooney Mara would jus wear a little bit of color and leave The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo behind, I have to admit she’s rocking this dress. I doubt anyone else could rock Lisbeth Salander coture.

I love Diane Lane in general (she just ages so gracefully), so maybe I’m a little biased but I loved her golden Seventies-esque dress.

Can a girl ever really go wrong with glitter and gold?

Another star with a retro flair was Julie Bowen, who looked a bit like a cross between a floaty light pink cloud and a girl headed to a  ’50s prom.

And her Modern Family costar Ariel Winter was so cute and age-appropriate. Plus, I saw her on the red carpet and she gave probably one of the cutest interviews ever.

Ravishing in Red

Red tones and dep purples were a big hit on the carpet. Reese Witherspoon and Natalie Portman looked particularly lovely in their red dresses, but my fave red of the evening would have to go to Dianna Agron. Her dress may look a bit like red doilies, but I find the effect to be stunning.

And not to be outdone by her castmates, Viola Davis wowed in a lovely deep color and daring slit.

And rounding out the overall Help fashion win, Emma Stone in a lovely purple and fuschia dress. Bonus: Check out that swank eagle belt.

Look at her strike that pose. Doesn't she look like her own Barbie? Or a mannequin?

On the Fence

There were a few looks that I couldn’t quite decide on.

Overall, I loved Charlize Theron’s throwback to old school Hollywood glamour. However, I want her to ditch the hip puff. If you’re going to go for sexy and slinky, why add extraneous fabric?

I adored the color of Paula Patton’s dress, but I’m not a fan of the meraid tail. I thought mermaid tails had gone out of fashion (or was that just my wishful thinking)?

This is Lea Michele’s second Marchesa in the past week. It is yet again a daring choice. I’m not sure I appreciate the overall effect since it sort of looks like a bird exploded on her chest. But somehow it’s flattering on her? I have so many mixed feelings about this.

Epic Fails

Piper Perabo, more like Piper Peraboo. That’s a lot of dress, and yet, I still feel scandalized.

Kristen Wiig may not be exposing nude bits, but her nude slip is still a flop.

Amanda Peet looked like a lacy wedding cake. Or a sister-wife, whichever.

Why, Sarah Michelle Gellar, why? I adore you, so why must you do this to me? Your tie-dyed dress is like the Acid-wash jean version of dresses. On the other hand, she let her two-year-old help pick out her outfit, which is kind of awesome and adorable.

Nicole Richie looks like something is growing out of her head, and although the dress is beaded, it looks like the ball gown version of chainmail. Joan of Arc evening wear?

Well, Nicole Kidman’s bedazzler got a workout

Oh. So this is how you go wrong with glitter and gold. We stand corrected.

–By Lindsay Ray

I kind of dig Vanessa Hudgens’s art deco dress. It’s like she’s starring in her own flapper-esque dinner mystery theater. And while she’s trying to convince you she’s innocent, her dress clearly says I’ve got you trapped in my web of lies.

Also in on the Twenties-era vibe? Alyson Hannigan looking lovely in red. She can join Vanessa for a little mystery. Or maybe they’re both stoked for the upcoming Gatsby adaptation and can see the flapper trend coming way before anyone else can.

Jennifer Lawrence’s dress looked like a visual representation of the sea. You know when Ariel made her first dress out of a sail in The Little Mermaid? She should’ve found some netting and called up Jennifer Lawrence for some tips on how to work it.

Emma Stone went with the color of the evening for the ladies. She pulls off a very Melanie Griffith from Working Girl vibe.

I like Nina Dobrev’s dress in theory, but I’m not sure I can really like those sleeves. And while it’s in the hot color of the evening, it goes into a category I put many dresses of the night in: good color, bad execution. Plus, I keep thinking it would make a fab evening dress for Poison Ivy to wear right before scampering off to cause some crime and flirt with Batman.

So the PCA’s had a dress showdown between two unlikely candidates: Julianne Hough and Sharon Osbourne. Both wore sparkly dresses with daring backs.  Sharon’s was just the slightly more respectable, AARP-card version.

Cutest cocktail dress goes to Ashley Benson.

Her Pretty Little Liars costar Lucy Hale, on the other hand, I don’t even know where to start. It’s like her dress had a split personality and one side was trying to eat her alive. Or she borrowed it from the wardrobe of Dynasty.

While Demi Lovato’s peach dress was a fresh color, I don’t like the bedazzled belly. I liked the red mullet dress she performed in even less.

Editor's note: Weird dress, sure, but NICE man-cessory.

Miley Cyrus. What to say about Miley’s dress? The top looks like a daring figure skating costume for the long program. But then there’s a tablecloth cascading around her crotch like a lovely linen waterfall. And there’s a mesh skirt? With like rainbow fish or neon glow sticks tacked on to the bottom? What even?

Lea Michele: If Egyptian queens were mummified in silly string, this is how I picture them looking. It’s like she’s the living embodiment of Weezer’s The Sweater Song: If you want to destroy her dress, pull this thread as she walks away.

And Jennifer Morrison looked like a crocheted lampshade.

And is it wrong to love a man in a plaid suit? If so, I don’t want to be right. Love you, Zachary Levi.

—Lindsay Ray with an assist from Ashley Espinosa

She sticks to a color palette
To flatter her complexion, the princess favors navy, neutrals and sometimes red. If she wears a pattern, it’s often black-and-white. On the rare occasion that she dons a bold color, she still wears her favorite neutral pumps.

…even for special events
For something special, she picks purple. Lilac for the BAFTA awards, a plum suit for her first royal Christmas.

A-line shapes
Shifts, wrap dresses, evening gowns, blazers: they all nip in at her (painfully tiny!) waist. It’s a flattering, classic fit that allows her outfits to be just a tad trendy, but never over-the-top.

Her designers on speed-dial
Sarah Burton for Alexander McQueen designed her infamous wedding dress, and she’s since gone back to Burton for other dresses. She often wears Issa (of the also infamous engagement dress) and Burberry coats.

Burberry, McQueen, Issa. Her black velvet McQueen gown last month drew comparisons to Princess Di.

She clutches a clutch
She’d never bog down a beautiful ensemble with a big shoulder bag.

She dares to re-wear
Donning the same hat, shoes and jeans just makes us like her more.

Classy and casual in cropped, dark skinny jeans

She dresses her man-cessory
She and William have to know that whenever they go out, all the pictures are focusing on her. So she makes sure that her walking man accessory doesn’t clash. She never matches William’s outfit, but she somehow always makes sure his clothes *go* with hers. Smart.

THAT HAIR
I mean, srsly.

–TC

FotW might be a misnomer as I’m not sure when this special aired. (I don’t live in the U.K. although I think it would be fab if I did.) But I just saw the video this week, so I guess it counts. And I have two different thoughts about Ms. Rowland’s outfit, and lucky you, I’m going to share both.

1.     All the downy stuff reminds me of one of my favorite lines from Clueless: “Well at least I wouldn’t skin a collie to make my backpack.”

2.     She looks like the Cruella DeVille of the swan world. How many swans died so she could look that awful? If she weren’t so bubbly with Michael Bublé, I would fully expect her to change and go all crazy Nina/Black Swan on us.

Bonus Royal Win

It’s really only appropriate to wear velvet during the winter season, and usually velvet dresses make me think of my misguided youthful fashion sense of the ’90s (and Angela Chase). However, if you’re going to wear velvet, this is how you do it.

Extra Bonus Fail

I so don’t get homeless and hippie chic, shown here on Vanessa Hudgens. And when will this lace trend go away? (Nothing against lace per se, but a whole set of pants it does not make.)

P.S. I totally have that robe, but I only wear it in the house.

–By Lindsay Ray